Thursday, September 24, 2015

You probably haven't heard of it but... The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss

“Call a jack a jack. Call a spade a spade. But always call a whore a lady. Their lives are hard enough, and it never hurts to be polite.” 


The worst part about coming up with ideas is that you forget a lot of things. You have this epic idea but you forgot something incredibly important. Something that should have kicked it all off. Something that would have made a splash. This is my something. This should have been my first book to tell you that you needed to read and I totally blew it. I'm sorry.

Neverwhere was the book that got me seriously into fantasy books and I told you, 2 weeks ago, that you should read it. If you've finished, you should get started on The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. Let me tell you what it's about before I tell you why you should add this 1,000+ paged book to your vastly growing collection:

Kvothe, our stories narrator and the not-so-loveable underdog, is a magically talented young man. A man who grows up to be one of the most well known wizards of his time (take THAT, HP). This is his story, as he's telling it. You know when you're on a date and you try to make yourself sound super cool and awesome? Kvothe doesn't do that. He bares himself and shows you how much of a shithead he can really be (and how much of a complete moron he can be because COME ON Denna is totally kinda sorta into you? Nevermind, I have no idea what I'm taking about). Kvothe is a child prodigy, which a really tough thing to be when you're dirt poor. It's even tougher when you have a smart mouth and don't know when to shut it up. This story, of over 1,000 pages, is one day. This is an entire days' worth of story telling. From birth (where he was on the road with his parents as part of a traveling troupe) to finally getting into the university (years younger than all the other children because he's a badass like that). Kvothe takes everything he knows about magic and makes it not only his own, but makes it better... And worse. He changes everything his world knows about magic. And he can't even grow facial hair yet. The growth of the characters in the story alone can bring a grown man to tears. Not gonna lie, Kvothe might be my #MCE.

Patrick Rothfuss is a god. I mean that in a joking way, but I'm also quite serious. This man not only takes a world that no one has been in and creates epic beauty, but he also takes something we all think we know (magic) and he makes it something completely different. He uses a new set of rules, except they're not new, they're old, very old. They're rules that everyone else forgot about. They're the things that somehow make magic make complete sense. It's science, but it's magic. It's strange and new, yet somehow familiar. Rothfuss handed me this book and basically said, "Look, I know this is a bajillion pages and it's pretty intimidating, but it's all there. It's all important." He didn't spend time describing everything down to the last molecule used in the paint that was on used on the desk in the room in the castle surrounded by a moat and in the forest. Rothfuss used every single page accordingly and filled it with the most beautiful and smooth prose I have ever read. The pages fly by. He builds up the correct amount of anticipation, at the right time, and for the correct length. It's like he just KNOWS when you're at your final point of, "Okay, BUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?!" and Rothfuss does not disappoint. Just read it. Okay?

Oh yeah. By the way. There's Dragons. Dragons like you've never EVER known a dragon before ;)

 - so I can sigh eternally -

 lauren.

Monday, September 14, 2015

The T-shirt Diaries: Morticia Addams

Before I officially start this post, I want to clarify something. When I say Morticia Addams, I'm going to go full hipster and make sure that you know I'm talking about the original Morticia Addams. The woman making weird hot since 1964. The woman my dad says he had his first crush on. The woman who runs a household I would die to have... Carolyn Jones.

I have all the DVDs, you can borrow them

Let's continue.

Yep. Those are fake.

 When I was growing up, there's two women I wanted to be: Morticia Addams and Stevie Nicks. I've recently had someone tell me that they think those two definitely fit what I portray. Now I can die happy.



I think Morticia always appealed to me because she was unapologetically herself. The Addams family were "weirdos" in their world and probably are still considered pretty weird. One thing that my mom always taught me was to be myself. One thing my mom always knew about me is that I'm kind of weird. I like reading about True Crimes and Serial Killers. I don't have a favorite color but black is my favorite shade. I read far earlier than most of my classmates. I wear black lipstick. I hung dead flowers from my ceiling. Spirit was my favorite store growing up (that was the only place that had black nail polish). None of my classmates liked anything I ever liked because they were too busy watching 7th Heaven.

Serious conversations with Buster (aka: Dobby)

That's what my mom (and Morticia) made sure to instill in me. Faith in myself.


The best part about this day and age is that everyone is a weirdo about something. There isn't a "normal" anymore. All you have to do is find other people who are weirdos too and be weirdos with them. And I can tell you, I struggled for a very long time to find those weirdos I call real friends. There were times when I thought the friends I had were real friends, and it turns out they weren't. And that's okay. Because someday, you're gonna find those people who make life worth living. 

A wise person once told me that normal is only a setting on a washing machine. They were right.


I've found my weirdos. Go find yours.

Bonus Funny Face because I know Jacob is clicking on this 2,000 times and I don't want to disappoint him.

Wanna buy this super awesome shirt? Good, because you should give my best friend, Jessica, all your money by clicking here

- so I can sigh eternally -

 lauren.

Thursday, September 10, 2015

You probably haven't heard of it, but... Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman

“The only advice I can give you is what you're telling yourself. Only, maybe you're too scared to listen.” 


I don't want to give this book a review. I just want to say, "WHY THE HELL HAVEN'T YOU STARTED READING THIS YET?!" There are few books in the world that I tell everyone they need to read because I know that people have different tastes and that not everyone likes the same things... But you know what? You need to read this book. Here's the link. Do yourself a favor. Read it. You're welcome.

For those of you who want to know more, we're not friends anymore because you clearly don't trust me.  But fine. Some guy in London (his name is Richard Mayhew) has a moment of decency and actually helps a human being on the street. Which, of course, catapults him into the underworld of London where monsters, saints, angels, demons... Everything you could ever think of actually exists and Richard is set into his destiny of SAVING THE WORLD and just OH MY GOD JUST READ THIS BOOK.

I'll tell you what. My best friend, Jessica, gave me the book and annoyed the hell out of me until I read it. When I started, I couldn't stop. I read that book well into the night (and morning) and I was so thankful I had. Seriously. This is a book that will throw you back into reading because the writing wraps you up and makes you believe that you're actually there. It makes you think that this is all real and all happening. Besides, you'll be introduced to one of this worlds best authors that's ever been created, Neil Gaiman, who's writing just engulfs you and leaves you needing more. Then you can read Sandman. You're double welcome.

 - so I can sigh eternally -

 lauren.

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

September: Month of Fashion and Pumpkin Spice Lattes


September. It is the end of Summer and beginning of Fall. It's the month before my absolute favorite month of the year. Most importantly, it is the month that releases the September Issue of Vogue. This issue, that has it's own documentary, is basically the Bible for Fashion for the year. It predicts the upcoming trends and tells us what we should wear. While I'm not a fan of having someone else dress me and tell me how to be, I am a fan of fashion. And these next few trends I cannot wait for. 

1. Boots, baby

Do you know what I hate most about Summertime? The fact that I can't wear boots without sweating up a storm. I love boots. I LOVE them. I can find a way to wear them with anything, trust me. I'm beyond excited that this Fall, they're predicting not only stomping boots, like the gorgeous Balenciaga Ceinture Boots on the left, but the thigh highs that Jonathan Saunders is showing at his Fall 2015 show. You know that means I'll be wearing my Sam Edelmans daily, right?

2. The revision of Grey Lady Suits

Lady Suits. It's something I don't wear but I admire. Maybe someday, when I'm an older version of myself, I'll embrace the suit. Especially grey suits. Grey brings a sophistication but isn't as harsh as black. And yet, you're still able to pair it with any other color. For now, I'll drool over Giorgio Armani's Fall 2015 collection (left). I'm in love with the pants. The small slit and the cut of it makes it feminine without saying, "HOW TIGHT CAN WE GET THESE BABIES?!" Which is much appreciated. Vivienne Westwood also steps it up with her grey suit on the right. I'm really looking forward to both their entire collections. Classy, yet modern.

3. The higher the waist, the closer to God, right?

If there's one thing about the 90s/00s, it's the low-waist thing that happened. I'm so glad I (most likely) won't be seeing anyone's thongs anytime soon. High waisted was a "mom" thing to do, but designers like Rodarte and Versace show that you can wear high waisted pants (and skirts!) without being like your mom.

4. The shorter the skirt, the closer to God...?

If there's one thing you should know about me and fashion, it's that I love short skirts. I wish I could hop onto the maxi trend, but I have to stand by my old favorite. With boots trending, how could short skirts not be? When it's cold out but you still want to show a little leg, you throw on a short skirt with thigh high boots and you're ready to go. Thanks to Saint Laurent (left) and Sonia Rykiel (right), I'm making sure I don't skip out on leg day.

5. Victorian Chic

There was only one reason why I watched the CW show, Reign. It was because I wanted all the clothing. I've always wanted a closet full of Victorian style clothes, but modern. Since I'm not genius enough to do it, people better at this than I am did it for me. Valentino (left) has a line that I am legitimately ready to give up my non-existent first born for. Givenchy (right) throws a bit more velvet into the game but keeps it much more true to Victorian.



All in all, I cannot wait for colder weathers so I can wear all these beautiful things. Is it October yet?

 - so I can sigh eternally -

 lauren.